Be brave.

Today was my first outing with Hazel by myself - we ventured 40 minutes down the 5 freeway to see Aunt Jamie and cousin Maddie. I was scared as all get out (aside from the power being out at our house all day). But I packed up my diaper bag to the brim, loaded us girls in the car, grabbed Starbucks drive-thru to feel like I was treating myself, and hopped on the freeway. We had a GREAT visit, I laughed and felt like myself again! Hazel taught me today to be brave, I am stronger than I think.

Every day is different.

I love routine. I always have - I love knowing what's coming next, taking the same route to work everyday, heading to the same lunch spots on my break, having a good routine. But with Hazel girl, every day is different. Some days are great, some days are terrible. Some days I feel energetic, some days exhausted. Some days breastfeeding works, some days it absolutely does not. I have never had so much variety in my days in all my life, but Hazel is teaching me!

Take your time.

I often want to rush things. I want to get through it, get to the easy part, hurry things along. Hazel is teaching me take your time and savor the moment. Go with the flow and don't hurry this baby along. She needs time, to learn, to grow, to eat, to swallow, to hiccup, to fall asleep.

Have patience.

There are SO many sleepless nights, frustrating crying fits, and breastfeeding disappointments. But amidst it all, Hazel is teaching me to have patience. It takes time. We will get it right.

You always need your mom.

I wanted us to do the baby thing on our own, just my husband and I. But after all of the complications and a big C-section incision to recover from, I caved and realized I needed help. After what is sometimes a rocky relationship with my mom, she was the only one I wanted while recovering. You always need your mom.

You make beautiful things.

We came home today, Hazel in-hand. One whole week in the NICU, and a ton of tests and sleepless worried nights later, we couldn't be happier to pack her into our Ford Edge and head home. Trevor played "Beautiful Things" by Gungor on the ride home while I sat in the back holding Hazel's tiny finger.  
You make beautiful things, you make beautiful things out of us. Take a listen...

Prayer works.

When Hazel was born on August 2, 2013, we both had an infection. After days on antibiotics (for both of us), Hazel ended up staying 1 week in the NICU and underwent a ton of tests, including one for Meningitis. Our families and friends sent up TONS of prayers - one distant family member sent a prayer request at the Carmel Mission, while our traveling cousins in Italy lit a candle for Hazel in a church there. We asked literally everyone we knew for prayers for Hazel, and prayer works. Hazel's tests all came back normal, her infection levels came down, and my heart felt whole again. God is so good.